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Adoption can be a
win, win situation for all parties involved.
You choose a currently better life and loving home for your unborn
baby. Your baby may get a
better life financially and maybe emotionally then you are able to give
them. A childless couple gets
the baby they have been dreaming about for years.
Always
remember…there is a choice and a way out of a difficult situation.
Please do not
hesitate to e-mail us or call us.
Mary, Nanci or Suzanne are waiting to help you, and to be there for you.
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1.
How long do adoptions take?
Depending on state laws, adoptions vary in time.
Basically once contact is made to the party you wish to
work through, things will start to be set up for you.
Your part for the most part is over after the baby is
born, so that you can go on to resume the life that you have,
and continue is your life plans.
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2.
How long do I have to decide about the placement?
Your decision to place is on the onset of
contact of the person you wish to work through. However, if after placing the baby you change your mind, you have
the time limit allowed by the state in which you give birth. Some states take surrender as soon as twelve hours after the baby
is born (as long as you are not under the influence of medication), and
other state do not take surrenders for three months. Adoptions are state regulated, not federal. Only certain federal laws apply, i.e.: black market selling of a
baby, taking expenses from several couples with for one baby, fraud.
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3.
What does surrender mean?
Surrender is a legal piece of paper stating that
upon your free will that you are giving up your parental rights. Sometimes these rights are given up to the adoptive couple,
sometimes to an agency, sometime to an attorney. Again this depends on the
state that you give birth in, laws. Some states will have you sign consent at the hospital,
agency, or lawyer’s office, while other states require you to sign
before a judge. Also in some
states you will have a revoke period after signing, again, the time
allowed depends on the state laws, in other states; there is no revoke
period.
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4.
Can I get the baby back after I sign the surrender and the revoke
period has expired?
In most cases you would have to seek legal counsel at
your own expense, and prove that the consents where signed under duress.
Duress meaning that someone was either putting you under unjust
emotional or physical abuse in order for you to sign the surrender.
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5.
Does the birthfather have rights; and what if I don’t know where
he is or who he is?
Yes, the birthfather has rights.
If the birthfather is known, along with his where abouts the
adoption plan needs to be discussed with him.
For the most part, he has all the same rights to this child as you
do. Sometimes this seems so
unfair as you are going through the pregnancy, but it is the law.
Many times birthfathers will agree to let the adoption plan move
forward, as they do want to give the child a possible better opportunity
in life, and they do not want the expense of paying child support.
Most states in the United States do have the “Dead Beat Father
Law”, which makes them pay the child support, or they can face a
criminal sentence.
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6.
What do I pay for?
In almost every case nothing. Payments
of expenses to a birthmother are state regulated. In some states the
adoptive parents are allowed to pay for everything adoption related and
after delivery support to help you get back on your feet.
In other states, only assistance in medical expenses is allowed,
and in other states no expenses are allowed to be paid at all.
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7.
What is the difference between using an agency, attorney or net
workers?
Agencies
can be an “all in one package”. Your
legal advice, counseling and ability to pick from their adoptive parent
profiles can be a plus.
Attorneys
in most cases practice other forms of law and are not strictly adoption
attorneys. They often do not
understand the “emotional side of adoption”. However they are great
advocated for birthmothers and certainly know the laws in the states that
they practice.
Facilitators
are usually working with a much smaller group of birthmothers. Many
facilitators work with attorneys and agencies so they maybe able to give
you a larger variety of adoptive parents to pick from. Facilitators may also set up your legal and counseling.
Many facilitators are adoptive parents themselves.
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8.
Does an attorney always have to be involved?
In almost every case an attorney will need to be
involved. Since adoption is
under the confines of the legal system, there must always be legal
representation for everyone involved.
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9.
Does an agency always need to be involved?
Only if the state that you have the child in is what
is called “agency driven”. This
means that every part of the adoption must go through with agency
assistance. You still have
the ability to work with an attorney or net worker; they will just need to
find an agency to help out as well. There
are only a handful of states that have this ruling.
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10.
Can I ask for a certain type of couple?
Yes, the choice to place your child for adoption is yours, as well as whom
you will place the child with. It is really important to let the people who you choose to
work with know that you are looking for a certain type of couple.
There are so many couples, and singles looking to adopt that the
choice is vast.
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11.
Who chooses the openness of adoption?
You do. Again
this is a placement choice. The
people you choose to work with should not present you with a couple that
does not want an open adoption if you do, or a couple who does want an
open adoption and you do not. This
truly is your choice, and always is subject to change on your part.
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12.
Can I name the baby?
If you desire to, you can. Often the naming of the baby is a compromise between the
birthmother and the adoptive couple.
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13.
Do I have to meet or talk with the adoptive couple?
Only if you want to. It is suggested however, that you speak with the adoptive
parents at least once. This
can defray any “wondering” on your part of what the adoptive parents
are like.
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14.
What is a medical release form and HIPPA agreement?
A medical release form is a document signed by you
giving permission for an agency, attorney or net worker to gain access to
your medical records in regards to the pregnancy.
Some of this information such as HIV, drug, hepatitis testing may
be shared with the adoptive couple. A HIPPA agreement gives an
agency/attorney/facilitator the permission to discuss the status of your
health with those involved in the adoption plan.
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15.
Can recreational drugs and alcohol harm my baby?
In some cases yes, however, if the drug and alcohol
use is stopped when you realize your are pregnant, the risk can be reduced
significantly. If the use
continues it can lead to long-term disability for the baby.
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16.
I have done drugs and alcohol through my pregnancy, and the doctors
have told me that this baby may be born with defects.
Is there anyone out there who will want to adopt this baby?
Yes, there are many couples out there
willing to adopt a child with special needs.
Many of these people have special training in working with special
needs babies.
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17.
Can my adoption be completely confidential?
Yes, as long as you are not a minor.
If you are a minor your parents need to know, however, all the
choices are legally yours to make. If
you are under the age of 14, your parents have the right to make all your
legal decisions.
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Available
couples >>>>
Birthmother's Options
Telephone: 1-800-450-7191
E-mail: connections@fairpoint.net
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